Out of the Shadows

Surya and his two wives.

Standing in the light of conscious awareness, we see a long shadow cast before us, the shadow of ourselves. This shadow is like a reflection of ourselves, in which we can see ourselves more clearly. Most of the time we do not notice our shadow, but when we turn to face it, we may see parts of ourselves that we were unaware of. Seeing that it is dark, we may becomes scared of our own shadows, afraid of facing up to what lies therein. "Everyone carries a shadow," Jung wrote, "and the less it is embodied in the individual's conscious life, the blacker and denser it is." The Jungian shadow is everything outside the light of consciousness, whether good or bad. It represents the aspects of yourself which are unknown to you, which have become repressed through self-denial. What aspects of yourself do you keep hidden? What aspects of yourself do you refuse to aknowledge? These aspects of yourself may be revealed to you through your dreams, as dreams are a way for your mind to explore thoughts and feelings which you have otherwise been unable to process.

Chaya is the Hindu goddess of shadows. She is the consort of Surya, the sun god. She was a replacement for his first wife, who left her shadow with him to look after their children. For a long time, Surya doesn't realise that Chaya is merely the shadow of his first wife. He doesn't realise his first wife has left him, because Chaya looks exactly the same as her. When he finds out, he is horrified. They have had three children together, and he didn't even realise who she was. Surya discovers that he doesn't truly know who his wife is, until he comes to understand her shadow self. Like Surya, we may become horrified when we discover things about ourself which had long been hidden from view. By understanding our shadow, we uncover the secrets of our inner depths. We come to truly understand ourselves and our behaviour.

The first step to uncovering the shadow self is to analyse our behaviour toward others. The things which annoy you about other people are ultimately projections of your shadow. Ask yourself, what is it about this person that annoys me? What is it about this person that frightens me? What does this say about me? Everything which you criticise most in other people lies deep within your own shadow. They are your personal demons, the things which make you tick, the things which trigger your aggression or sorrow. When you uncover these things, then you can consciously come to terms with your demons and face your fears. Your shadow also contains all the wonderful things you are too scared of becoming. Ask yourself, who do I admire? What is it about them that I like? What is it about them that makes them better than me? All of those aspects are lying dormant within you, waiting to be realised. You can uncover more secrets of your shadow by observing your instinctual behaviour. Do you feel drawn to certain behaviour even though you know it's no good for you? Do you find yourself spending too much money even though you need to save money? Do you find yourself eating unhealthy foods even though you know they're not good for you? Do you find yourself lazing around for hours even though you know you need exercise? There may be many patterns of behaviour in your life which you feel unable to control. Ask yourself, why would I do this? Am I punishing myself? Am I holding myself back from something I feel unworthy of?

Once Surya realised who his shadow wife was, he was able to claim back his first wife. Unknown to him, she had been living in the forest in the form of a mare. He had no idea how graceful and pure she was, living free and wild in nature. All this time, he had been living with her shadow, but now he claimed back her true self. She returned from the wilderness to live by his side. The two wives sit happily on either side of Surya, the sun god. The sun is a symbol of consciousness, and his wives are symbols of our ego-self. The first wife represents the unbridled wild soul which is full of great potential. The shadow wife represents the outer persona which we use to hide our secrets. Surya made peace with his wives, and they were able to live in harmony.